greelin

if y’all want to date anyone 5’4 an under i’m going to need you to recognize that there is effort involved. they need their outside time but you have to be willing to stand around with them too bc you never know what birds of prey are in the area and it is your responsibility as their partner to make sure they don’t get scooped up. like. that is the bare minimum. c’mon

airlesscell

My stomach is not feeling well can I have a ginger ale please

loudmouthed

WHY would you want weed socks where you gonna wear those?? to church???? to school? to work? no you’ll wear them at home by yourself and take pics of them for the internet bc there’s little marijuanas on them

chaumas-deactivated20240115

I love when hardcore Harry Potter fans try to insult people by calling them “muggle” and “mudblood”. not only is your vitriol toothless and comical, it’s also establishing you as one of the bad guys…?

professorsparklepants

Ornery Old Man Cursed To Only Make Chicken Noises

lichrelly

omg some ppl are so good w words.. the best i can do is ough ough awooga i think

thicchighness

Sex before marriage is a sin. Unless you do it doggystyle, cause all dogs go to heaven.

Follow me for more biblical loopholes.